All near misses, I'm pleased to say:

1. Hit a catering size pizza lying in the middle of the carriageway on a corner near Waterloo station once. It was OK until the Mozzarella moved under the front wheel...

2. Going along when confronted by a flying fridge that had fallen out of the back of a scrap wagon that had hooned round the corner too fast, coming the other way. It went over my head and according to the police car behind (for once, I pleased to see them) missed me by less than a foot.

3. Hit by a taxi at Piccadilly Circus that had jumped the lights. Managed to keep the bike upright and pulled into the side of the road. A foot PC had seen it happen, called ahead and got another policeman to stop the taxi. I then had to give policeman 1 a lift up Regents Street on the back of the bike to where the taxi was stopped - me with L plates and policeman wearing his police helmet. I got some very funny looks from passing DRs... The taxi driver accused me of ramming him and got very well nicked indeed.

Also once saw a bloke on a C90 with more mirrors than Sting's scooter in Quadrophenia and the back of the bike covered in reflective tape. I rode along behind him, watching him checking in all of his 18 mirrors as he rode into the back of a taxi...