Bastard Bear, whilst not perfect (who is? Apart from Samantha Janus, that is...) is an honest-to-goodness, sound geezer. Not afraid to speak his mind, but sound of morals and strong of principles, he is a valued friend and all-round good egg. Not the best looking man on the planet, he is a bit of a mover when it comes to the ladies - his wit and quickfire charm never fails to knock them off their feet. 

The highly-paid IT job he has secured himself has enabled him to buy one of the world's ultimate sportsbikes - the Kawasaki ZX9-R - and boy does he know how to use it. 

A hardworking, upstanding member (sic.) of the community, I am proud to count him amongst my friends.